I found it torturous if the conversations lasted and she appeared to be enjoying another man’s company. It was always with some relief when they asked for her name or number, as they so often did, that she would politely smile and ignoring their request respond with, “It was a great pleasure speaking with you”, before turning to exit the train. Once, early on, she suddenly turned toward me and caught my gaze before I could divert away. I held it for a second without registration and then nonchalantly resumed peering at the newspaper I pretended to read. I never let her catch my eye again. I was biding my time, counting on chance to someday place her next to me. That I might speak to her without her knowledge of my growing obsession was what I had hoped. It was unusually crowded on the train that day. The only relative peace I found was in the crowded alcove between the two forward most train cars. Once again my spirits sagged since where I had seen her standing would place her two. Our parents died about a year ago. Now I'm 18 and he is 20. We lived together in the house we grew up in. And I also had a nice friend named Jessica I liked hang out with a whole lot, so much that she was like Jeff's other sister. We were hanging out in my room just chilling. “So how is life?” Jessica asked. “Fine I guess. I got Jeff here. He dropped out of college so he could get a job and support us while I go to college. So he is like a saint,” I replied. “He sounds like a saint. Can I ask you something?” Jessica asked. “Sure, what is it?” I asked. Then she got close to me and whispered to me. “Have you ever seen his dick?” Jessica asked. Then her cheeks blushed. I could tell she into him, but I had a secret she had no idea about, so was I. “Why are you interested in him?” I asked. “Maybe. Would you be mad if I asked him out?” Jessica asked. I didn't know what to say. If she went with him, would my shot with him just go out the window? “Are you really interested in him, or is it.
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